Ten Years of Heartache
by CrazyCarmen
Summary: Ten years after Ron's disappearance, Hermione gets a rather unexpected visitor.
1. Default Chapter

It was his move. She knew she had him cornered-there was nowhere else to go. Deep blue eyes concentrated on the black figures in front of him, and he winced. He had never been defeated before. Ever. He ran a hand though his fiery red locks, sighing. "Bloody hell." he muttered, clenching his fists tightly out of anger.  
  
The girl across from him was grinning madly. She knew better than to snicker-he'd throw a tantrum again. Clearing her throat, she fidgeted a bit in her chair, lip caught between her teeth as she absentmindedly twirled her fingers along her equally crimson plait. "Well?"  
  
"Knight to C-4. There. Happy now?" The boy snapped, irritated.  
  
"Elated." Her deep chocolate eyes lit up, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "Checkmate!"  
  
The boy huffed, rolling his eyes. "Don't be stupid. I let you win!"  
  
She, of course, rolled her eyes. "All right, whatever you say." She stood up smirking, and stretched her arms. "I have work to do."  
  
His eyebrows shot up, and he stood as well. "You're not going anywhere! We're having a rematch!"  
  
"I don't have time for stupid chess anymore! Just admit that you lost-- it won't kill you, you know."  
  
"But I didn't!" he shouted defiantly, temper beginning to flare. "You. You cheated!"  
  
She arched her brows at him before breaking into a fit of giggles. "Honestly! That's ridiculous! I never cheat and you know it!"  
  
He glared at her, untamed hair falling into his face. "Don't be such a bloody kn-"  
  
"Ethan Ronald Weasley!" But it wasn't the girl who spoke; it was the woman in the kitchen who had come into the sitting room to sort out the argument that was currently disturbing her work. "You know better than to use that tone of voice! Especially with your sister!"  
  
"But Mum!"  
  
"No buts! You know what today is! We have to go to Falling Waters in two hours! Get dressed, both of you!" She turned to her daughter, "Oh, and Charlotte-Wear that new jumper I bought you, all right?" She sent them a weak smile before heading up the steps.  
  
Ethan and Charlotte looked at each other and frowned. They knew that this day was one of the hardest. Even though their eleventh birthday was only a few short weeks away, this was no time to celebrate. It was exactly ten years ago since their biological father had disappeared. They noticed that this day was especially hard for their Mum. Sure, she smiled and carried on with her motherly duties, pretending like everything was normal, but it wasn't. Ethan and Charlotte didn't talk about it, but they both noticed that the twinkle was gone in their Mum's eyes. She looked tired and worn out. Her eyes were puffy and her hair was messier than usual. She'd been crying again. It made the both of them quite uncomfortable when she was like this. They loved their Mum dearly, and hated when she was sad.  
  
Charlotte broke the silence. "Well, I suppose we'd better go on and get dressed."  
  
Ethan shrugged, kicking his toe into the rug. "I s'pose so."  
  
They both scurried upstairs, dreading the rest of the day.  
  
*~*  
  
It was a bright sunny day. There was a light breeze, but overall it was perfect. Not for me, though. How could it have been ten years? Ten years seems like an eternity without him. Oh, how I miss him. I miss everything about him. I miss the brilliant red freckles that covered his face and how more would appear in the summertime. I miss his hair, which changed from a deep crimson colour in the fall and winter to a bright orangey red in the springtime. I miss his contagious laugh and smile. I miss the way he'd look after a victorious quidditch game or chess match. I even miss the possessiveness, procrastination, sarcasm and immaturity that made him so. Ron. Most of all, I miss his voice. I miss the way he used to hold me and tell me how much he loved me. I miss the way he whimpered, pouting after doing something wrong-and how I always forgave him. I miss the way he kissed me, whispering words of admiration and passion in my ear when we made love. I miss everything about him, really, because he was my first love. My only love. The tears I've shed for him could rival the amount of water in the oceans. There was nothing I could do, I know, but it is just so difficult. It's hard to look at our ten-year-old daughter and son, who both have the exact freckles and hair that I'd grown attached to over the years. It's especially hard to look into Ethan's icy blue eyes, because I see Ron every time. I told myself I wouldn't cry today, that I'd be strong for the children, but I felt my lip beginning to quiver, and tears stinging the back of my eyes. I motioned for Charlotte and Ethan to go to the car, and they obeyed without question. They know how difficult this is for me. They're angels, really. And then I re-read his memorial stone for what seemed like the millionth time. Ronald Weasley. Beloved son, husband, friend, and father. Father. It made me so angry. Sure, when Ethan and Charlotte were born, we were a bit apprehensive about parenting, but Ron was a natural. He was such a great father. He loved those babies more than anything. It's not fair. Why did he have to accept that mission? I knew the missions were dangerous for any Auror, but Ron wasn't even particularly nervous about this one. He kissed my forehead and left for work like any other day, but unlike any other day, he didn't return that evening.  
  
I had run away then. Back into the Muggle World with my parents. I panicked and didn't know what to do, especially with Harry gone. The Wizard World was in turmoil, a harsh war that I didn't want my children to be involved in.  
  
They don't know about magic. They don't know about potions, spells, magical games, or the fact that their parents were Head Boy and Head Girl at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. They didn't know their father was the winning quidditch keeper three years in a row, or I had broken the school record for OWLS and NEWTS in fifth and seventh year. They don't know any of it. I shouldn't have been so stupid, though. I suppose Ron's disappearance had caused me to put off the 'magic' talk. Their eleventh birthday is a few weeks away, and I'll be expected to bring Charlotte and Ethan to Platform 9 ¾ in six short months. Ron is supposed to be there with me, sending our children away from home.  
  
I hate the fact that Ron missed his babies grow into two beautiful children. I hate how he missed their first words and steps. He missed Ethan's first chess set (non magical, of course) and victory, and he missed the first story that Charlotte had written. He missed Christmas, their birthdays, and all of the holidays in between. I'm anxious for the future without him, I'll admit. Sometimes I don't know if I can make it through the day, but I always force myself to be strong, for them. And for him.  
  
Wiping the tears from my eyes, I look around the cemetery, making sure nobody is in sight. Quickly, I pull my old wand out of my robes, and pick up a rock from the ground. Muttering lightly, I transfigure the rock into a single long stemmed rose. I kiss its petals and place it gently on top of Ron's memorial stone.  
  
I whisper softly, "Goodbye, love. I miss you." And walk away; ready to face another year without him.  
  
*~* 


	2. The Redheaded Man

Chapter Two  
  
*~*  
  
Spring came and went, and soon enough it was summertime. Hermione knew it was a foolish thing to do, but she had no other choice. She needed this book for work, and their babysitter, Mrs. Banks, was away on a holiday. So here she was, back in Hogsmeade with her children. Flourish and Blotts seemed exceptionally crowded today, but Hermione remembered that Hogwarts would be back in session within a couple months. She shook the thought and continued to scan the shelves, wanting to get out of there quickly.  
  
Charlotte ran up to her mother smiling brightly. "Mummy! I want this book!" She held out a two thousand-page book on Advanced Arithmancy.  
  
Hermione frowned. "Oh, dear. Sweetheart, I told you not to look through any of these books! I'll buy you a new book when you get home."  
  
Charlotte sighed, placing the book back on its shelf and looking around for her brother. She knew that they were going to a strange place, or so her Mum said, but the people there were. different. She couldn't explain it. She continued to watch the people for a while before walking off to find her brother.  
  
Ethan was stalking about grumpily until a certain section caught his eye. Brows raised, eyes wide, he grabbed a few books before scampering off to his mother. "Mum! Hey, Mum. What's.quidditch?" He asked, tapping the book's cover.  
  
Hermione gasped, shaking her head. "It's nothing, sweetie. Here..." She reached in to her pocket for a few knuts she'd saved. "Go to the store across the street and take your sister with you. You'll find lots of sweets there, all right? Come and get me when you're finished."   
  
Ethan surveyed the funny looking coins for a minute before shrugging. " 'Kay. Char-!"  
  
"No need to shout, Ethan, I'm right here." She rolled her eyes.  
  
"Oh, well... Mum wants us to go buy some sweets across the street." He grinned a bit.  
  
Charlotte arched a brow. "That's funny, Ethan. Nice try. Mum never lets us buy sweets! You know how they can give us cavities and rot away-"  
  
Hermione, who had been flipping through another book, looked up. "No, Charlotte, it's all right today. Just hurry back, okay?"  
  
Charlotte beamed. "Thanks, Mum!" And dragged her brother across the street to Honeydukes.  
  
*~*  
  
Charlotte and Ethan entered Honeydukes, and their jaws dropped slightly.  
  
"I've never seen so many sweets before!" Ethan piped, excited.  
  
Charlotte picked up a small box and surveyed it. "Chocolate.frog? Eww!" She looked disgusted and threw the box back into its bin. She walked around a bit more. "I've never seen sweets like these." She picked up a box of odd flavoured jellybeans, reading the ingredients.  
  
Ethan shrugged. "They're not normal, that's for sure." His eyes set on a large barrel of shiny rock candy. "But they look good!" Brows furrowing, he wandered over to the barrel that a redheaded man was digging through, and plucked out a sugar quill. "Aren't you a bit old to be shopping in a sweets store?"  
  
The older man was taken aback. Well, well, well. little snot. "Excuse me? Now give that back! It's the one I was looking for!" He snatched the quill from Ethan.  
  
Charlotte ran over, overhearing the commotion by the sugar quill bin. "Hey! My brother had it first!"  
  
The man huffed. Two of them? "Yes, well your brother needs to watch his mouth when speaking to elders."  
  
"I was only asking a question!" Ethan smarted, stealing the quill back.  
  
"Why you little-" He reached for the quill again, but the boy was quick and took a step back.  
  
"No, I had it first!"   
  
This kid seriously reminded him too much of himself. Gritting his teeth, he crossed his arms. "You give that back to me before I tell your mother."  
  
Charlotte crossed her arms over her chest, brows raised defiantly. "Go ahead. Tell our mother. She'll yell at you for sure."  
  
The man huffed and rolled his eyes. "Oh? Well what kind of mother would allow their children to smart off to adults!"  
  
"Ethan had the quill first!" She stomped her foot on the ground, glaring a bit.  
  
"Yes, well, Ethan also smarted off to me fir-" he paused, looking taken aback.  
  
Charlotte sighed. "Come on, Ethan. We're not supposed to talk with strangers anyway. Give him the sweets."  
  
Ethan scoffed, throwing his arms in the air. "No! I had it first!"  
  
The elder man shook his head, waving his hands, looking somewhat estranged. "Just. Just take it."  
  
"No!" Charlotte snapped. "Give it to him, Ethan."  
  
The man shook his head. "No, kid. It's fine. Just. Just take it." But he couldn't take his eyes off the pair. And the girl, oh her eyes.  
  
"No, Ethan! We don't even know this place. It could be poisonous, or something."  
  
"Oh, don't be silly, it's not poisonous." Goodness, she acted just like her, too. The older man thought he was going mad.   
  
Ethan nodded. "Seriously, Charlotte, quit worrying it's fine."  
  
"Maybe you should ask mum first."  
  
"Oh, please!" Ethan snapped, and rounded on his sister.  
  
"Fine! But don't be mad at me if you get sick from poisoned sweets!"  
  
"Oh, will you shut up already, you annoying little prat!"  
  
"Don't call me that, Ethan!"  
  
"Why not? It's true!"  
  
"Is not!"  
  
"Is too!"  
  
"Not!"  
  
The man jumped between them. "Hey, knock it off! You're causing a scene!" He sighed, scratching the back of his neck. "Let me take you back to your mother."  
  
Charlotte had a frightened look in her eyes, and she took a step back. "We're not supposed to go anywhere with strangers!"  
  
The man sighed audibly. "You know, your brother's right. Now come on, where is your mum?"  
  
Charlotte yanked Ethan's sleeve. "Honestly! Don't you ever read about criminals and kidnappings!"  
  
The man rolled his eyes. "Look, little prat, I fight criminals and bad guys all the time. Now tell me-nevermind, I know where she is."  
  
"How do YOU know?" Ethan dared, taking a step back as well.  
  
"Because I'm smart like that," he said dryly, snatching their sleeves. "Now come on!" Dragging the devils outside, he tugged them across the way towards Flourish and Blotts.  
  
*~*  
  
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	3. A Reunion

Chapter 3  
  
*~*  
  
"Oh my goodness! Ethan, you dolt, DO something! He's going to kill us!" Charlotte hissed to her brother, eyes wide in terror as she began panicking.  
  
Ethan rolled his eyes at his sister. "Calm DOWN! Can't you see he's heading towards the bookstore where mum is?"  
  
"But what if he-"  
  
"Enough!" The redheaded man shouted. "Bloody hell, are you two a handful." He muttered to himself, pushing open the door to Flourish and Blotts and letting go of their sleeves.  
  
"Mummy!" Charlotte bolted to the back of the store. "There's a man! And he tried stealing Ethan's sweets! And he took our sleeves and told us to find you! And I think he's really, really angry. You should apologize to him, mummy. Ethan was being a little pra-erm, smart alec." She corrected herself, taking a breath.  
  
Hermione whirled around, four large textbooks in her grasp. "What are you talking-Oh! Sweetheart, I thought I told you not to speak to anyone."  
  
"I know, mum. Honestly. But-"  
  
A very grumpy looking Ethan leading the mysterious man to his mother, cutting off Charlotte. The elder man walked up behind Hermione, and his footing seemed to falter within a few feet. He stared down at the woman who was once his wife. He opened his mouth to speak but his throat went very dry.  
  
Hermione, on the other hand, was accustomed to her children getting into trouble, Ethan in particular. She didn't bother turning around. She flipped hastily through the Advanced Potions book as she spoke, eyes glued to the page. "I'm very sorry that my children have caused you any trouble. They didn't mean any harm, I assure you." She said in a voice that sounded oddly like an old female professor's. Sighing, she continued. "It's just that they've never been here before, and I wanted to get out of here as quickly as-"  
  
"Hermione." The man had cut in, finally finding his voice.  
  
A chill instantly shot through Hermione's body. It was him. There was no doubt in her mind. It was a much deeper voice than what she was used to, and she dropped the massive books to the ground with a loud thud. But she couldn't turn around and be disappointed for what seemed like the thousandth time in the past ten years. She felt silly, and she knew that she'd look ridiculous, but she kept her eyes shut and whispered to herself. "Oh, God... It can't be." Shaking her head, she made herself turn around. Deep cinnamon eyes connected with electric blues and she gasped audibly, numbness overtaking her senses. "Ron."  
  
Charlotte looked to her brother with wide eyes. They knew each other? She opened her mouth to ask her mum how, but she couldn't. Hermione had fainted.  
  
*~*  
  
Her first semi-coherent thought was that it was all a dream. No, a nightmare. An evil nightmare that left her waking up and feeling as depressed and distraught as the day that he left. But the memories were too vivid to have only been a dream. She snuggled into her comforter when realization donned on her. How had she gotten back into bed? Though her head oddly felt like it weighed thrice its normal weight, she involuntarily emitted a soft groan as she forced herself from her supine position, propping herself up to lean back against her headboard on her pillows. That's when another thing didn't make sense. How had she gotten back into her nightgown? Before she was able to jump to any conclusions, her daughter entered the dim room.  
  
"Mummy? Are you awake?" She whispered softly. Her voice sounded terrified, and she was shaking with the tray of food she prepared.  
  
"Yes, Charlotte." She rasped, voice dry. She raised a hand to her forehead to feel a cloth bandage wrapped around her head. How on earth had that gotten there? Once again, her daughter interrupted before she was able to ponder on that thought.  
  
"You fainted in the bookshop, mummy." Squeaked Charlotte, carrying the tray to her mother's bedside. "Gave me quite a fright." She whimpered, sounding much older than a ten-year-old.  
  
Then it wasn't a dream. "But, how in heavens did I."  
  
"The man brought you home, mummy." Charlotte cut in, sitting down on the bed beside her mother. "I TOLD Ethan that it was a bad idea, but of course, he wouldn't listen. And the man insisted! So he bandaged you up and-"  
  
"Wait a minute." Hermione cut off her daughter, eyes wide. "What man?" She asked, terrified of the answer.  
  
"That redheaded man from the bookshop. Don't you remember?"  
  
Hermione shut her eyes. Ron was dead. He had to be. He was pronounced dead ten years ago.  
  
But they never found a body. Nodding lightly, Hermione cleared her throat as she timidly asked, "Is he still here, Charlotte?"  
  
Crimson plaits swayed as she nodded. "Yes. He's downstairs playing videogames with Ethan."  
  
Hermione blanched. He was still there in her home? What if he told them? What if he told them about himself and their past and disappeared again? The thought was unbearable and she grimaced. "He didn't say anything to you, did he?"  
  
Charlotte raised a brow. "Like what?"  
  
"Nothing." Hermione waved her hand, a large sigh of relief escaping her. "Nothing. Could you do me a favor and ask him to come up here, sweetheart?"  
  
"He scares me, mummy. He has guns and knives and-"  
  
"It's alright, dear. He won't hurt you." She leaned down to kiss the crown of her daughter's head.  
  
With an exasperated sigh, Charlotte retired to the sitting room to fetch the fiery haired intruder. 


	4. Answers

"Do you know how to play Dragon Capture 4, Ron?" Ethan tossed the small CD case to the elder man, still rummaging through his collection of videogames. "Your name is Ron, right? S'what my mum called you in the bookshop. But-she's been quite loopy lately. a bit off her rocker, if you know what I mean." He shrugged, raising a crimson eyebrow at the stranger. "But if you want, you know, mum told us to call old people by their last names, so Mr-"  
  
Ron stared at the game, examining its case. "Er. Ron's fine." He had a feeling that Weasley wouldn't go over too well. He tapped his fingers against the game, laughing some. "You know, my older brother used to work with dragons in Romania," he said matter-of-factly, tossing the game back to Ethan.  
  
Ethan stared at Ron as if he'd grown a second head. "Are you mad? Dragon's don't exist." He popped the game into the Playstation and handed Ron a controller. "Press A to jump, B to attack. All right?" He took a seat on the couch beside Ron.  
  
The older of the two redheads quickly caught onto the game, and soon enough the two were laughing and challenging each other to rematches. After an hour, their fingers were sore from clenching the controls for so long. "All right," Ron said, laughing. "You win. But we'll have another go later."  
  
Ethan smirked. "I always win." A light bulb seemed to go off inside Ethan's head. "Oi! D'you want to play chess?"  
  
"Chess? I haven't played chess in. well, in ten years, at least. But, sure!" Ron was having so much fun with this kid he barely knew.  
  
The younger boy snickered. "Okay, you can be white. I'll let you go first."  
  
"Big mistake, lad." Ron peered over the edge of the chessboard. "Pawn to C- 3!" He announced clearly, and furrowed his brow in confusion when the piece wouldn't move. "Pawn. To. C. 3," he said again, and then looked up at Ethan who was staring at him, looking somewhat afraid.  
  
"Er-you--you have to move them. Um, chess pieces don't--well, they don't have ears." Ethan gulped lightly, crossing his arms over his chest, still staring at Ron oddly. "How do you know my mum?" he queued, biting his lip.  
  
Ron sighed, scratching the back of his neck uncomfortably. "We were friends growing up," he replied simply. "Schoolmates," he added with a shrug, reaching to his pawn and moving it to C-3 nonchalantly.  
  
Ethan stood, glaring lightly. "Mum told us she went to a private school for girls only in London." He paused, tiny blue eyes set on identical larger ones across from him. "You're sure she'll be all right?"  
  
A wince escaped Ron and he shifted again on the couch. "Yes. Yes, she'll be fine." He stood, reaching for his coat. "I should probably go. I was going to wait for your mum to wake, but I'm not so sure she'd want to speak to me after all."  
  
"Wait!" Charlotte scampered down the steps, braided plait long and ginger down her back. "Mum's awake. She wants to talk to you." She cast an apprehensive look at Ethan and joined him on the couch as Ron ascended the stairs.  
  
He reached the doorway and knocked a few times before peering in. "Hermione?" he said rather shakily, leaning against the doorframe.  
  
"Come in, Ron," she whispered, and he moved to stand at her bedside. Chocolate eyes gazed up to him, and she took an unsteady breath. "You're, oh, Ron-You can't be!" A choked sob escaped her and her hands flew to her mouth.  
  
"Shhh," he whispered, sitting down on the edge of her bed and placing a hand on her knee. "Hermione, it's okay. I'm here."  
  
Tears were streaming down her face by now, too exhausted to interrogate him. "You're d-dead!" She cried, leaning forward to bury her face in his shoulder. "Oh, Ron! It's-it's impossible!" She stammered, body wracking with sobs.  
  
Ron's own tears fell silently, wrapping his strong arms around her, holding her close. "I'm not dead, 'Mione," he rasped, knowing he owed her quite the explanation. "When Harry was-" He gulped, running his hands over her back soothingly. "-killed," he continued, barely able to get the words out. After ten years the pain was still fresh. "Lucius Malfoy kept me alive. He wanted to prove he had some sort of sick power over my father, keeping me as his servant. He kept knocking me with Imperius curses, and for years I was his fucking slave," he said bitterly.  
  
"Oh, Ron!" Hermione sniffled, "I'm so sorry! I should have-"  
  
"There's nothing you could've done," he whispered. "When Moody found out Lucius had some sort of underground network of Death Eaters, he found me and got me out. My mind was nearly scorched from the curses, though. It took him two years to restore my memory."  
  
"But you're back? I mean, you don't have to go and fight since the network was destroyed, right? It was in the news. I still subscribe to the Daily Prophet, though the children-" She broke off, pulling back lightly to look into his eyes. "The children! They-they have their father back!" She threw her arms around his neck, and he pulled her into his lap, rocking her gently.  
  
"You haven't told them, Hermione? About Hogwarts? About-us?" He ran his fingers through her curly mane, giving a sigh.  
  
"No. Oh, Ron. I couldn't. It hurt too much. They're going to get their letters in a few weeks, and I still haven't told them. I'm a horrible mother, I know. I just-couldn't-"  
  
"Bloody hell, Hermione. Don't you ever say that again," he tilted his head back to look at her again, his gaze set on hers as he tucked a stray curl behind her ear. "You raised those children beautifully. Oh, 'Mione, they're amazing. Both of them. All because of you." He smiled. "And Charlotte, oi, she's your bloody clone, that's what she is." He snickered.  
  
"And Ethan's the spitting image of you, nasty temper and all. He has a heart of gold though, just like his daddy," she whispered, silent tears spilling down her cheeks. Her trembling hand reached up to caress his stubbly cheek and she smiled wider than she had in years. "I've missed you so much, Ron," she rasped, running her free hand through his crimson locks.  
  
He felt his heart swell for her, and he slowly bent his head, their lips merely centimeters apart when-  
  
"Ahem." Young Ethan's voice caused the two of them to jump apart, blushing wildly as if they were seventeen again. He stood in the doorframe with his sister, both of them crossing their arms accusingly.  
  
Charlotte gazed anxiously between her brother, her mother, and Ron. "So, do we get an explanation or what?"  
  
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